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I am Blue, in Pain, and Fragile

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DzǨdz‹›‘•Š‹•—††‡Ž›•Š‘—–‡†–Š”‘—‰Šƒ‘—–Šˆ—ŽŽ‘ˆ hamburger steak. DzǥŠƒ–ǫdz DzŠƒ–ǯ•ƒgreat ‹†‡ƒǨdz She swallowed the bite that was already in her mouth and stared at me with her usual intense eyes. I knew in that moment that I made a mistake. Dz…Ž—„ǥŠƒ–ǯ•‹–ǤI could start one! Why did I ‡˜‡”–Š‹‘ˆ–Šƒ–ǫǨdz She took out a memo pad and started scribbling something on the paper. Dzƒ‹–‹‰ƒ”‘—†–‘ˆ‹†•‘‡™Š‡”‡–Šƒ–ǯŽŽƒ……‡’–‡‹•ƒ™ƒ•–‡‘ˆ–‹‡Ǥ  †‘ǯ–‘™Š‘™ ‡˜‡””‡ƒŽ‹œ‡†–Šƒ–ǤŠƒ•ˆ‘”–Їƒ†˜‹…‡Ǩdz Her cheeks pinked in elation. Dz‘ǡ—Šǡ–Šƒ–ǯ•ǥ‘–™Šƒ– ™ƒ•‰‡––‹‰ƒ–Ǥdz Dz ‘™ƒ›’‡‘’އ†‘›‘—–Š‹™‡‡‡†–‘ƒ’’Ž›ˆ‘”ƒ…Šƒ”–‡”ǫ ‹˜‡ǡ ƒ›„‡ǫ ǯ†‡‡†–‘‘ˆˆ‹…‹ƒŽŽ›…‘ˆ‹”–Šƒ–ǡ„—––Ї”‡ǯ•ƒŽ”‡ƒ†›–™‘‘ˆ—•Ї”‡ǡ so I –Š‹™‡Œ—•–‡‡†–Š”‡‡‘”‡Ǥdz Dzƒ‹–ǡƒ”‡›‘—‹…Ž—†‹‰‡‹–Šƒ–—„‡”ǫdz Dz‡ŽŽǡ ‡ƒǡ‹–™ƒ•›‘—”‹†‡ƒǡƒ‡†‡Ǩ†™‡ǯ”‡ˆ”‹‡†•ǡƒ”‡ǯ–™‡ǫǨdz We had already reached the point where Akiyoshi sometimes called me by my first name. I assumed it was to lessen the awkwardness of asking favors or thanking me. I hardened my face just enough to not overtly dampen her enthusiasm. DzŠƒ–•‡‡•Ž‹‡ƒŽ‘–‘ˆ™‘”ǥdz Dz ‡ƒǡ™‡ǯŽŽ•–ƒ”–‘ˆˆ™‹–Šƒ…–‹˜‹–‹‡•–Šƒ–™‘ǯ–„‡„‘”‹‰™‹–ŠŒ—•– –Ї–™‘‘ˆ—•Ǥ‘—†‘ǯ–Šave to do anything that makes you unhappy. We …ƒއƒ˜‡–Ї”ƒ‰‡‘ˆƒ…–‹˜‹–‹‡•’”‡––›™‹†‡‘’‡ǡ–Š‘—‰ŠǤŠǡ™‡ǯŽŽŠƒ˜‡–‘ ƒ‡•—”‡™‡•–‹…–‘‘—”’”‹…‹’އ•ǡ•‘™‡†‘ǯ–Œ—•–•‡‡Ž‹‡•‘‡™‡‹”† ƒ†—Ž–•Ǥdz Her vision was expanding outward infinitely with no destination in sight, and I had a front row seat. Dzǡƒ‹••‹‘•–ƒ–‡‡–•—…Šƒ•ǥǫdz Dz‡…‘‹‰‘—”‹†‡ƒŽ•‡Ž˜‡•™‹–Š‹ˆ‘—”›‡ƒ”•Ǥdz DzŠǤdz